The Fourth Kind Review

What a disappointment. I’ve seen this movie weeks ago and it took me to now actually write down in coherent words how angry it made me. I saw the trailer a few times prior to actually seeing The Fourth Kind and it looked amazing. The idea of watching a documental re-enactment of paranormal events had me completely suckered in. I always fantasised about alien abduction theories and I was more than willing to be completely taken in by the suggestion that all this could be a reality. The whole advertisement campaign blatantly boasted that the whole story was backed up by actual archive footage, it all seemed pretty solid; that is, until all the lies are unfurled like a rug of heart breaking dissatisfaction. First, I think I should give you a background before I bitch about all that.

Our story is set in Nome, Alaska where since the 1960s people have been mysteriously disappearing. The FBI has, apparently, investigated the area and each case but no truth has ever been revealed; that is until Dr Abigail Tyler, a psychiatrist working in Nome tries to justify her alien abduction theories. Her husband was inexplicably murdered right beside her, in their bed. How she didn’t see a murderer and claimed it was an alien, I don’t know but I always thought extra terrestrials came in peace, not land down on your planet to spontaneously kill your spouse. E.T would be hanging his head in shame! I don’t want to give the whole game away but there are some individuals in the town that are patients of hers that see the same owl every night, suffer from insomnia and generally see terrible, terrible things that the audience never hear much about. Typical.

Now to the bitching. I believe that it’s very important that I should mention that upon doing a bit of research for this review I found out some very interesting information. Apparently a few American newspapers were trying to investigate the validly of their footage and case studies to find that apparently Universal attempted to deceive the public with fake articles online and fake obituaries to justify that everything they were telling us was basically real. There was no need! There are thousands of cases all over the world where people have claimed to have and alien encounter, could they not have based a movie loosely on that and tried to get some interviews and photos? Nah, that would obviously involve hard work.

I also thought the acting was pretty stale. It’s like all the actors knew they were going to regret starring in this movie a few months down the line. That, and Dr. Abigail Tyler was the most annoying person I’ve ever been forced to watch in my life. Thank god she’s fictional. She just whines the whole way through, even at the start when she just states her name, it sounds like she’s whinging. Also; that whole dead husband thing? Please, spare me. The characters mention it literally about 40 times even when it’s not necessary. Yeah, it’s bad times that he’s dead but does Bambi mention his mother as much after she’s basically shot in front of him? No? Then suck it up, no one cares, we just want to see aliens terrorising poor Alaskan folk.

The end was pretty annoying too. Rather than justifying the possible existence of extra terrestrials we’re just led to believe that Dr Tyler is a complete psycho that possibly killed her daughter without knowing it. Even her 10 or 12 year old son didn’t want anything to do with her then when the events were unfolding to years later when he was in his 20s. Small boys would lap up the idea of their little sisters being taken away by UFOs, it’s like a dream come true! But they had to make him dull too.

I will admit, the split screen perspective contrasting the ‘actual’ footage with the re-enactment was a great idea and it was probably the only thing that was keeping me interested. That, and the aliens that the audience couldn’t really see. Even the footage when down the path of realism and included the distortion a real UFO would create; great effect, but it made all the fun stuff harder to see and a bit frustrating. They were probably playing on the use of imagination and getting scared of what you can’t but potentially could see, like the famous shower scene in Psycho but if I really wanted to use my imagination I would’ve stayed at home with some crayons and A3 paper.

In conclusion, this whole affair should be approached with caution. Don’t go to see it expecting to be dazzled by a great story or awesome special effects, it won’t happen. If anything, watch it for the novelty and enjoy how it potentially could’ve been amazing. I can’t believe that they delivered The Fourth Kind so lazily especially when it looked so innovative. I hope that someone will pick up on this movie’s strengths and rejuvenate all the aspects that simple didn’t work. Learn from your mistakes and try again next time Olatunde Osunsanmi! You’ll direct something epic someday!

Raditiude-Weezer Review

Raditude. Sounds freakin’ awesome doesn’t it? Well, despite the name, Weezer’s new album isn’t fantastic but it’s not awful either. I’m sort of on the fence with this one. When I first gave it a quick run through, I didn’t like it at all; it felt like The Red Album’s retarded sister. As I write this review now, it’s growing on me more and more. I guess that’s what happens when alternative rock and power pop are so skilfully meshed together by Rivers Cuomo.

There’s no doubt about it, this is an extremely catchy album. There’s really no resisting getting caught up in all the fun and energy that Raditude has to offer. Coincidently enough, I think this is my main problem with this whole affair. It feels like rather than giving the listener some tender yet happy go lucky heartfelt tracks Weezer are just throwing pop song after pop song at us in the hope of something finding itself into the headphone of someone who never knew that the Blue Album or Pinkerton ever existed and would possibly turn their noses up at.

Maybe I’m just being too hard on Raditude, there’s no doubt that there have been some changes in popular culture and I know Weezer are all growing up and eager to experiment with new sounds and they’re good at what they do but I can’t help lament the loss of the original sound that I feel in love with and connected with all those years ago.

On the whole, yeah it’s not all that bad. Their new single ‘(If you’re wondering if I want you to) I want you to’ is proudly placed as track number one; it’s a fantastic song, probably one I’d associate the most with the Weezer I know and love. The next few songs bare the traits of the alternative rock, power pop ballad. I genuinely don’t know weither to appreciate these from a lover of alt rock stance or to just shut the hell up and dance mindlessly, nonetheless they’re decent enough songs to listen to if you’re in the mood to party. Speaking of parties ‘I can’t stop partying’ featuring Little Wayne comes up fourth in the track listings. This is really a guilty pleasure, like finding a Lady Gaga album hiding behind your Rage Against the Machine albums. This one will defiantly appeal to the masses. Again; we continue with our league of funky, bubbly tunes cascading together to create a fusion of jiving and swaying your head back and fourth, not heavily, not softly but somewhere in between. ‘Love is the Answer’ is pretty nice, I like the atmosphere that’s generating from the sitar and seemingly traditional Indian vocalisation. It’s a nice change from everything else going on. The last few tracks aren’t anything overly special from the rest of what you’ve probably heard or I’ve talked about.

This is a Weezer album I don’t think I’ll ever really care about or fall in love with. It’s something to take out when you’re in the mood for something light hearted and even funky for a jive around your bedroom but I don’t think, in the long run, that it will stick. I’m not sure if any other big fans are disappointed by this musical turn out or if I’m just being melodramatic. This hasn’t diminished my love for the band in the slightest; I’m just hoping that they adopt another change soon that I might be able to connect to. For now, I’ll keep Raditude close to my stereo, learn the lyrics to the songs, choreograph my own dances and just wait for my next Weezer album to see if their sound gets better. We’ve come along way from ‘My Name is Jonas’.

Yes Man Book Review

There's a pretty good chance that you, the reader has heard of 'Yes Man' in the last year or so, probably because of the cinematic release starring Jim Carrey and Zooey Deschanel. Whether you enjoyed the movie or not I desperately urge you to pick up a copy of this book. I'll start by stressing that the movie is only based on the idea of Danny Wallace's true story and the series of events of each are completely different, excluding maybe, less than an egg cupful of instances.

Basically Danny feels like he isn't making the most of life and he's in a bit of rut but suddenly a stranger on a bus tells him to; "Say yes more." And so his journey of enlightenment and discovery begins!


I would tell you more about the sort of things he gets up to but it would ruin the spontaneity and fun of the story; and well, there's much going in a relitivly small space of time, its hard to comprehend or explain what actually happens, although I will stress that doesn't feel exagerated.

Mr Wallace's conversational style of writing makes this lessof a reading experience and more of a long friendly chat that has the potential to change your life. Even though our hero has some set backs along the way; his generally positive attitude is truly contagious! Every so often he takes a bit of a philosophical turn and I'll reveal that the last time he does this,naturally at the end of the book, I was trying to fight back the tears as so many home truths just came flooding back.

This was an inspiring, witty and all round pleasant read and I wouldn't be surprised if you have a go at it and find yourself trying out your own yes experiment, and believe you me; it's a hell of a lot of fun!

This book will really show you what living is all about and put a great, big smile on your face in the process.

Cats Don't Dance Review

I know all too well that Cats Don’t Dance is not the most popular of feature length animated features. It was released in 1997 and due to a lack of promotion and the fact that it was grossly overshadowed by Disney’s Hercules, Batman and Robin and Titanic it was a massive box office bomb. It kills me inside to think that this movie never really had a chance especially when it had more imagination than the average Disney movie with slightly better spontaneous musical numbers.

Our story beings in 1939 with our main protagonist Danny, the all singing all dancing cat from Kokomo, Indiana who decides that he is going to follow is dream of going to Hollywood and getting his big break in the movie business. By 10minuites in it’s clear that Hollywood isn’t what it’s cracked up to be and the glamour of stardom is only for lucky, talented humans not anthropomorphic animals. Danny and his new animal friends get a part in the new Darla Dimple film. Lil’ Ark Angel. I love Darla Dimple; she’s like a mix of Shirley Temple, Angelica Pickles and a deranged, psycho, maniac with slight homicidal tendencies. Every child’s movie needs a Darla Dimple. Anyway, after a slight confrontation with Darla and her 10foot valet Max (who must be resemble Frankenstein in some way) after ‘jazzing up’ his one line in the movie Danny finds out, pretty violently that “Cat’s say meow.” Later, he talks to the studio’s mascot Woolly the Mammoth and sees that all his grouchy friends once had the same dream as him but their spirits were crushed by the realities of how Hollywood works. Does this stop Danny’s enthusiasm? Hell no! He decides to bring everyone together for a music and dance session and rekindles their love for performance; he even touches the heart of Sawyer, another cat whose dreams were long lost and is cynical about ever performing again. With a little push from Danny she realizes her passion for dancing all over again but this is short lived because, she naturally doesn’t want to get hurt again. Darla sees them and concocts a plan to trick Danny and humiliate all the animals and cause them to never be able to work in Hollywood again. Her elaborate plan is a success; everyone hates Danny for trusting her and getting their hopes up so he gets back on the bus to Kokomo. Suddenly; he decides that the fight is not over yet and promptly gets off the bus, finds Pudge the penguin and explains his plan in all its awesomeness. He plans for the animals to perform at the Lil’ Ark Angel premier and, they obviously do since every kid’s movie needs a happy ending but before hand he has an epic battle with Max that has a conclusions that’s really is too amazing for words.

That may have been a long plot summary but I am really passionate about everyone seeing ‘Cats Don’t Dance’ at least once in their lifetime. It’s a hilarious movie that deserves more credit than what it was given twelve years ago. It also has a very important moral I think everyone should live by; if you’re truly passionate about something and you fall victim to prejudice from those ‘superior’ to you, never, ever give up. Do everything you can to make your dreams come true and believe in yourself. I can’t believe that this got swept under the carpet for the worst batman movie ever made and a movie about the ship of total irony.

I also love how the setting really immersed the viewer in the world of 1939 and even though children wouldn’t even pick up on it, they still included references to famous actors of the time like Clark Gabel, Cary Grant, Laurel and Hardy and even King Kong. The references to ‘Gone with the Wind’ we’re pretty clever too.

I urge everyone who is reading this to find ‘Cats Don’t Dance’ on youtube and don’t make excuses claiming that it’s no longer there because I know that it’s there blatantly in eight parts. It’s a comical, heart warming film that children will love and older folk will love even more.

Toy Story

Toy Story was the best thing to ever happen to Disney, Pixar and every person the world who was once a child. I have no doubt about it. It hosted a start of an animation revolution being the first computer animated feature film but it isn’t for this reason that it has taken it’s place among cinematic greats of the ages; it focused on the most important elements of movie making; a fantastic story and character development. It’s depressing that these fundamentals are so simply forgotten nowadays.

Toy Story’s main theme is based on the idea of what would happen if every time you closed your bedroom door your toys came to life. A simple enough concept I think anyone can relate to pondering as a child. Baring this in mind; our story is set in Andy’s room with his toys including his favourite; Woody, a pull string cowboy doll. Andy receives a Buzz Lightyear action figure for his birthday which now leaves everyone who inhabits the roomin awe of Buzz; except for Woody who feels like he has been replaced. Becauseof his jealousy Woody finds that he has caused Buzz and himself to become lost toys. They try to find Andy but instead find themselves in his next door neighbour’s house who spends his time brutally torturing his toys. Now Woody and Buzz have to put their differences aside and work as a team to try to get back to Andy before moving day.

This is a truly hilarious motion picture but I think thatmost of the jokes appeal more to adults more than to children; upon watching it again recently I realised that when Buzz realises that he’s not a real spaceranger he looses it he gets really depressed and even experiences a descent into madness along the way. When I was younger and much more innocent, Ithought that he was just doing something funny, that’s all. In this sense I can proudly say that Toy Story is really for anyone of any age and I doubt any one could not enjoy this timeless classic in some shape or form.

The animation may look pretty cheap now but this is an example of a flawless piece of cinematic genius and I will challenge anyone to tell me otherwise with solid justification.

Roll on Toy Story 3 in June 2010; I pray it lives up to the original.

Gamer Review

I went to see Gamer a few weeks ago, and if I wasn't contented by having peanut m&ms in my popcorn I would have been greatly disappointed with my day out. I will admit, it wasn't the worst movie I've ever seen but I'll still maintain that I wasn't too impressed.

Our story takes place the not to distant future where RPGs and life-simulation games have been taken one step further. Instead of controlling a computer animated character manually, humans now have the power to control other humans who work in these games via mind control. In the movie, the two main games, created by eccentric billionaire Ken Castle, are Society, a Sims based simulation and more importantly Slayers, a first person shooter maybe based on the Call of Duty franchise.

Right, every one seems to love Slayers and its main character Kable and they follow the game on screens all over the world like a TV show. It's like watching the Truman Show, but that had Jim Carrey, which obviously made it better. The characters in Slayers are actually convicted criminals and if they survive so many rounds of the game they win their freedom. No one has ever really come close to winning except for Kable, of course, who is controlled by an irritating teenage boy who is enjoying the popularity and benefits that have come from having power over Slayers' most famous and well loved character. Mr. Castle realises that soon, Kable will beat the game and have to be freed so he puts the scariest black guy I have ever seen; who happens to be Chris' dad in 'Everybody Hates Chris' into the game but the twist is; he's not being controlled and therefore has another advantage over Kable apart from being about 6 foot and built like four brick houses. At this point some group kick in and grant Kable and the boy the power to talk to each other and he begs the kid to let him control himself so he can escape the game and find his wife and daughter and round house Ken Castle.

The idea behind his movie was actually a very interesting one. Seeing the future where our world is obsessed with RPGs to this extent was pretty cool to see but I thought the actual movie was quite boring. It felt too long, despite only running for 95minites and I really didn't care about the characters or their situation. I really just couldn't emotionally connect with them and that?s usually pretty easy for me. The only thing that really kept me watching was Michael C Hall playing Ken Castle. I just loved how ridiculous and eccentric he was; in any other average movie I would have wanted him dead but since there was nothing really entertaining going on I held onto him for hope. I didn't have much hope if you can tell.

I wouldn't suggest that you'd pay a lot of money to see this movie but maybe you'd enjoy it if you're into brutal violence, partial nudity and an obese creepy guy getting off on playing Society looking for cyber. Well this is probably for you. Personally; I'll pass on ever seeing it again.

Back to the Future Review

Back to the Future is easily one of the most iconic movies to come from the 1980s. Upon its 25th anniversary in the summer of 2010 I will happily proclaim that this is as a full fledged classic. As a childof the 90s that became a teenager in the 21st Century I am proud tosay that I have been influenced by this time travelling adventure to the extent where I can quote the movie from the opening scene of part one to the closing scene of part three. It’s just that freakin’ good.

It’s a science fiction adventure purpose built on the enjoyment of everyone; it’s safe for children, it’s got jokes for adults and has loads of technical jargon for a die hard fan to rhyme off. It’s really perfect in that sense.

When you really think about all the events that unfold inBack to the Future, it can be a bit hard to take in but our story revolves around the main protagonist Marty Mc Fly and his manic scientist friend Doc Brown. Doc Brown invents a time machine, one thing leads to another and Marty ends up in the year 1955. He meets his parents, stops them from falling in love which in turn has endangered his very existence. So; he has to find Doc Brownin 1955 to “send him back to the future” while trying to get his parents to fall in love to prevent him from evaporating into nothingness.

I will admit, my short synopsis will never do the movie justice. While watching Back to the Future, everything feels simple and straightforward but; explaining the content each movie plot does make it allsound pretty ridiculous, especially the second, it’s a nightmare of a mouthful.In saying that; would it not take genius to take a storyline such as this and make it enjoyable and easy for anyone to understand? I’m going to say so.

It’s not what I’d call a side splitting comedy but the jokes are pretty funny. It’s great how Doc (in 1995) doesn’t understand Marty’s bizarre 1980’s phrases and the way he deals with the preposterous notion that Ronald Reagan, an actor in the 1950s is the president of the United States in1985, is priceless.

The actors used aren’t particularly well known nowadays but looking back, they were perfect for their roles. Imaging that Eric Stoltz was originally supposed to play Marty McFly makes me feel a bit uneasy and I know for a fact that Christopher Lloyd was born to play Doc Brown.

This is a fantastic movie and I’d recommend it to anyone so when it comes on at Christmas I suggest that you take an hour and a half to watch it. If it takes your fancy I think that you should take another few hours to watch Back to the Future Part II and Back to the Future Part III.

A Clockwork Orange Book Review

'A Clockwork Orange' is basically a nightmarish vision of a futuristic alternative reality, similar to our own, where the ultra violent youth reign supreme. Anthony Burgess' interpretation of such a society was just as relevant when it was first published in 1962 as it is now, in the 21st Century.

The story is humbly narrated by 15-year-old Alex, as the story begins following him and his group of 'droogs' as they prey on just about everyone they can during an average night, performing acts of the ultra violent.There is a power struggle within his group and his alpha dominance is challenged to the point where he is betrayed by this 'droogs' and caught by the police forthe final time. He is sent straight to a state prison where after two years of serving a forty year sentence he is put forward for the Ludovic Technique; a treatment which would supposedly 'cure' Alex and make him incapable of violent or sexual thoughts. If Alex feels in any way hostile toward anyone, even those who threaten him, he immediately feels nauseous tothe extent where he feels like he's going to die. After two weeks Alex is set free back into the troubled society from whence he came and coincidently bumps into those who he has terrorised and thusly gets a taste of his own medicine but he is no longer able to defend himself.

I should probably mention that Alex speaks and thinks in Nadsat, the terminology of the teenagers of this alternative future and at first it looks really intimidating, it almost put me off reading the book but once I started, the meaning of each word, in context, was pretty easy to accurately guess and once you're finished reading using whatever vocabulary you picked up is addictive to use in everyday conversation!

You can probably tell from that quick synopsis that the subject matter of 'A Clockwork Orange' is quite dark and if even though I didn't find the scenes with explicit violence particularly shocking, if you're squeamish or if you've chosen to stay away from the topicsof rape, brutal assault and murder in your literature maybe reading 'A Clockwork Orange' won't benefit your fragile mind in any way.

On the other hand I have officially made this my favourite book. Period. And maybe I'm a twisted bitch for doing so but I would never have imagined that such a story could be told in such an enjoyable and even heart warming way. By the end I really did feel like Alex was a very close friend of mine and despite all he did I was sympathetic and even proud of him and how far he came. I don't know how Anthony Burgees made a juvenile delinquent to that extreme so loveable.

If you enjoy your dystopian novels like George Orwell?s 1984 and Aldous Huxley's Brave New World I'd definitely recommend 'A Clockwork Orange' and if you haven't read any of those I'd still tell you to take a dip into it. It's a fantastic and pretty short read and I can guarantee that it will have you glued to every single page.

If you have any problems with the language here?s a Nadsat Dictionary to use at your disposal.

http://soomka.com/nadsat.html

O brothers, it's a real horrorshow of a tale.